Revenge of the Odds And Sods

I bought different toothpaste this week. Some variety of Colgate. It claims that it's "infused" with cleaning crystals. "Infused?"  Er? Haven't they just walloped some lumpy bits into their latest concoction?  I suppose that doesn't really fit the image they are striving for though. "Infused" implies gentleness. Conjuring images of tea ceremonies and big bowls filled with rose petals gently soaking in water. So the process they use to produce and flavour their fluoride enriched pastes must be similar. Needless to say I'm not convinced. Or enthused.  

And while I'm on the subject of toiletries. Lynx now produce shower gel containing "glacier" water (presumably now freely available thanks to global warming. Every cloud etc.). Call me "dense" but how precisely does "glacier" water make shower gel, (sold incidentally in containers shaped like the handle of an Armalite) better than gel made from non glacial water?   

The latest "After Eight" advertisement features another one of those "100% Natural" claims. This time though it's Peppermint oil. Interesting considering "Peppermint" is a herbaceous rhizomatous perennial plant, not an oil. I suppose it's possible the 100% natural peppermint oil Nestlé use was laid down during the Cretaceous period like fossil fuel. And it's minty properties were only recently discovered, oozing into large pools. Perhaps these peppermint oil pools are similar (but cooler and mintier) to those the equally "natural" Kettle Chips bathe in.  

HMV (Group) reckon that their sales will increase in the next year. And how will they achieve this? Thorough revamp of their branches? Developing innovative ideas to rekindle their moribund brands?  Aggressive discounts on their range of music, DVD's, books and games in an effort to attract people back through their doors? No it's is predicated on the realisation that, with the removal of Borders, (along with Virgin / Zavi / Woolworths) you don't have a choice. If you want a CD or a book you'll be buying it from an HMV outlet (which includes Waterstones) as there's no-one else left on the high street. Now there's a company with a strategy defined by ambition, drive, a strong sense of it's own worth combined with the necessary dynamism to succeed. Sorry I'm getting confused. What I meant to say was "Now there's a company hoping to grind out a result on the basis that other companies are worse off. And if they do manage to survive it will be largely down to pure, blind luck". Christ I should've been a retail analyst.