“Think Tank” claims Angry Since 1967 lacks “relevance”

A leading think-tank claims the recession has rendered Angry Since 1967 "irrelevant". One of the authors of the report suggested “Angry Since 1967 is much less relevant now than it was - even a few years ago. We don't believe it reflects the values demanded by the current economic realities. Wearying cynicism may well have been a useful skill during the days of plenty, but now either meek compliance, being flexible enough to fit inside a chimney, or a willingness to return to domestic service, are of greater relevance. Sculleries don't, after all, clean themselves.” They further demanded the appointment of a blog-czar to monitor future blog content, claiming the current regulator was "fucking useless as they don't share our narrow predilections." 

Angry Since 1967 was unavailable for comment. However the regulators "Ofblog" denied these claims. “Angry Since 1967 is performing well. Our independent inspectors indicate, that while there has been a decline in impotent rants about recruitment agencies, the new initiative of transposing “Angry Since 1967” on to vaguely topical events, to just to score low blows, or as a way of making some deeply obscure point, shows massive promise. Indeed they report the blogs' causticity is such that we have had to recalibrate our usual measurements. The blogs’ cynicism continues to exceed its targets and is far ahead of our expectations. Further we are confident there is a continuing commitment to the core “Angry Since 1967” objectives, of delivering unrelenting bile in indigestible, badly constructed sentences. We accept there have been some issues during the transitional period however, there is cause for optimism. These issues appear to be nothing more than short term aberrations. Consequently "Angry Since 1967" continues to have our full support."

Researchers blame “Convenient Scapegoat” for “everything”

Results from a recent study suggest a convenient scapegoat is the main cause of today's problems, and that this trend is likely to continue. Speaking earlier one researcher claimed “We fed the most up to date data into our models and the results are clear. In 95% of cases a convenient scapegoat is responsible”

These results are likely to re-ignite the so-called Convenient Scapegoat-gate controversy of last year, and have been already greeted with complaints from self styled “convenient scapegoat sceptics”. One, who preferred not to be named, claimed this survey was just a “convenient scapegoat” hiding the real truth. They continued "cause and effect are much more difficult to ascribe to events than simple, headline grabbing scare stories about overweight, drug addled, kids, dying, either of heart attacks brought on by climate change, or being murdered by perverts trawling the internet for their next victim. All they do is present a superficial reading of reality, editorialised to the point of the nonsensical, which frames the debate in such a simplistic fashion, that any attempt to solve the problem, as defined by the headlines, is doomed to failure. There's always more to a problem than the catchy sloganeering would have you believe."

A leading expert on convenient scapegoating, condemned this view. They claimed “Yeah they're right, but for god sake, they should have kept quiet for the common good. The second people realise the problems of big bad world can't be reduced to a pithy headline, or resolved with just an equally snappy campaign slogan, then that's us done. Our salad days, when we could hobnob with rock stars, appear on Newsnight, or knock out 500 word  articles with inconsequential admonishments and some hand-wringing, for "The Observer's" Sunday magazine about how changing your brand of washing-up liquid can make a difference, will be over."

Successful "Reboot" Gets Second Series.

We can exclusively reveal Angry Since 1967s show "Public Domain Detective Revamped For The Nth Time" will return next year. Speaking exclusively, Angry Since 1967 said "Yeah we've been so impressed with the ratings we've sent a couple of our researchers out to see what other properties, worn threadbare by over exposure and countless remakes, we can revamp for the 21st century. Although it's too early to confirm any more details, expect some interesting developments". We understand the properties being looked at include a SF retooling for "Anthropomorphic Animals Beside A River", a rebooted "5 Middle Class, English Kids From The 40s And 50s Solve Mysteries" featuring the addition of a camper van and a pesky dog. We are also led to believe that two more traditional dramas are also in the works - “Classic 19th Century Novel About Love In A Country Mansion" and "Something By Charles Dickens. Either "A Christmas Carol" or "Oliver Twist".

Rumours about two other shows “Traditional English Hero” and “Mythical English King” have been categorically denied. “We don't believe there's the appetite for these characters yet, as it's only been a matter of days since the end of their last rebooted, re-imaginings. Of course this will, likely as not, change by the end of the week once we've come up with some quirky twist – like setting them on the Moon”

Asked about the possibility of classic TV shows being updated, Angry Since 1967 claimed "I'm always asked, following the return of "Dreadful, Illogical, Time Travelling Pantomime" and "Remnants Of Humanity Sit Around A Farmhouse Table, Discussing Animal Husbandry And Crop Rotation" as well as our recent acquisitions "Dreadful Aul 1980s U.S. Hokem About A Talking Car" and "Ponderous SF Show Filled With Self Indulgent, Unsubtle Allegory, Completely Missing The Point Of The Original", whether "Stilted, 1970s, Low Budget, SF Drama With A Prop Resembling An Aquarium" will return. All I'd say is "wait and see". Certainly I'd be interested in another series, if the reboot is sufficiently idiotic and divorced from the original, that beyond the name, it bares no resemblance to the original show. Say giving it a pirate setting, for instance. Or it's done with a knowing wink. Or it's been leadened with "contemporariness". And of course we shouldn't forget the great shows like "Flogging A Dead Horse", "Money For Old Rope" and "You May Not Remember Why This Worn Out Crap Was Eventually Axed, But I Certainly Do", which are crying out to be reintroduced to a modern audience. These would certainly stand an update. That and the fact it's easier doing this than trying to come up with something fresh and original"